Dealing with the bumps in the road

Sometimes we get tired. Sometimes we get our period. Whatever the reason, there are times when we just don’t have the energy to be optimistic and positive. I’m not saying that I’m depressed or pessimistic about things. I’m just sort of in between today. I did do some things that make me feel good now that I’m reviewing my day. I had a few moments where I reverted back a few steps when hubby started drinking for day #5 in a row. But, I regained my composure, and I will address the issue tomorrow when I am sure there is someone inside to hear my concerns.

So, I woke up abruptly this morning because I was having an incredibly vivid dream that was so real I had to jump out of bed and run around checking on my kids and house. I was dreaming that someone was stealing my computers and van while the girls and I were in the house alone, and it was just so incredibly real. Door wide open, my monitors gone and packed in the back of my van…and i went outside in my robe (had to grab phone and I even hit 911 on my way outside to see what was going on) and there is this guy putting stuff in my van…my stuff, my neighbors stuff, all sorts of neighbors, he’s walking in and out of houses like he’s at WalMart…and then i woke up. I jumped out of bed, checked the girls, the front door, my office…I was so out of sorts that I really couldn’t function properly for hours. No amount of coffee or Red Bull helped. It was very weird. Especially since I rarely even remember dreaming. Perhaps it’s all that repressed emotional crap I have been bottling up since I was about 4 years old? LOL You let it out for a moment and it starts to take over your life! Even when you are sleeping! BAh! LOL (yes my humor is odd, and even more so when I’m very tired).

Alright. So. I had a bad moment or two today. No one died, life goes on, I’ll resume working on my goals and not dwell on things that do me no good. I know I can’t change other people, only myself. And I can change how i deal with my husbands weaknesses. Obviously the ways I’ve tried to convey my displeasure have not worked, so it’s nuts to keep repeating them.

Before I go…Congrats to Meg for getting to come home! I know that is so much nicer than being in the hospital where there is constant activity. I’ll be asking the universe to keep an eye on you, just so you are safe. You mean lots to us!!

Now, i am going to pass out before i end up with a keyboard stuck to my forehead. Have a wonderful day!!

:)